Maybe They Are

Maybe they are. . . my lines, that is. Second ultrasound was on Tuesday. I've been really nauseous. I threw up for the first time over the weekend, and it's been mind over matter to keep from heaving at various points since then.

Despite that, the 'what ifs' crept in.

What if your morning sickness is just psychosomatic?
What if they stopped developing, but your hcg is still up so you're still sick?
What if they turn out to have heads shaped like cornmeal muffins, because that's the only thing you're eating?

It wasn't pretty.

The ultrasound on the other hand, that was pretty. Two perfect babies. They've gotten so much bigger since 6 weeks. We could see brains and spines and arm buds developing. And both had beautiful, strong heartbeats. Watching them on the ultrasound probably goes on the list of the most amazing experiences of my life.

So that's it. I'm released to my OB. I have two more weeks of smurf crotch, and then I get to go drug free!

We still have to clear the genetic testing hurdle, and I'm scared of that one. I found out last week that I have a mutation of the ATM gene on my chromosome 11. That means I'm screwed up on both 9 and 11. I worry about what that might mean for these babies. But I love them, and despite the nausea and the burping, I am so damn happy to be here - almost 9 weeks pregnant, with two babies who have heartbeats!