That Time I Did Microdose Lupron Flare

So here we are, my third/fourth IVF attempt. Because I view the whole thing as one grand, emotionally draining, financially devastating science experiment, I asked to do MDLF this time. What can I say, I haven't done it before, and I like pushing buttons to see what happens. This was an as-yet unpushed button. 

I have no idea yet what the outcome will be. My first monitoring appointment is Wednesday, so we'll see then. My AFC was 7, not great, not as bad as it's been. We have a chance, at least, albeit not a good one. 

In some ways, there's a good chance this week could be a repeat of two weeks ago. Then I got the calls that I hadn't gotten the job I wanted, and we had no blasts make it to freeze.

In an unexpected turn of events, I wound up with a lone day 7 4AA blast that was sent off to biopsy. Knowing that it's a day 7, and I'm 40, it doesn't really have a chance. See here for a great study on aneuploidy by day and grade.  

I'll probably get the 'aneuploid' call about that around Friday. The job? Well, when I got the 'you didn't get it' call, the manager also told me she was trying to get another vacancy. I think if she does, I'll be the selected candidate. Today's the day she'll find out. So there's a good chance I'll also get the 'sorry, didn't get the vacancy' or even the 'got it, but you're still not selected' call this week, too.

On the upside, after the calls three weeks ago, these won't be as bad, because I already thought I hit the worst case scenario. These will just be a confirmation of the worst case scenario! Exposing myself to the possibility of a good scenario brings with it the large risk of the worst case. So I'll grin and bear whatever calls I get this week, and keep chugging a bit further knowing that as long as I'm chugging, there's a chance of a good outcome.