Monday, May 14, 2018

Mother's Day Nostalgia

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Mother's Day is an oddly conflicted day when you're a mother but have no living children. I am glad that I got to enjoy my 23rd year doing Race for the Cure with my mom. She's a two time breast cancer survivor (victor?), and we've done Race together each year since the first one after she finished chemo. Different states run it at different times of the year, but in MN, it's on Mother's Day, which is a nice tradition. That said, it was hard to be doing the same course again this year that I did last year while pregnant with Quinn. The pain isn't acute, but there was a gnawing sense of loss remembering the spots on the course where I had to stop for dry heaves last year. Only in the land of loss and hormones does one get nostalgic about nausea! 

I'm a few days into my 'strike 1' treatment cycle. I say 'strike 1' because we're adopting a 'three strikes and you're out' model. Three last cycles, then we stop treatment. At baseline, I had an AFC of 6. Not my best, not my worst, either.  I can hope that I'll get a few mature to boost my estrogen. I am trying to hope that acupuncture and sildenafil will also help my lining out. Alas, my period after ~ 2 months of acupuncture wasn't much more than spotting, so I'm not expecting any miracles (although I'm hoping for them). If I can get to 7 and trilaminar, I'll be thrilled. I do acupuncture Wednesday and Friday, yoga on Tuesday. Either it will help, or I'll know that I've done what I could. Relative wins, either way. 


Just for record-keeping, this cycle I'm on: doxycycline 100mg 2x/day; dexamethasone 0.5 mg @ bedtime; Estrace 2mg 2x/day; sildenafil 25 mg suppositories @ bedtime; Menopur 1 vial in am; Follistim 225 iU in pm. I'm not sure if it's the intended effect, irritation, or an allergy to the compound medium but I feel swollen from the estrace and sildenafil. Fun times. First monitoring appointment tomorrow.

3 comments:

  1. I’m glad you got to spend the day with your mom doing Race for the Cure. Two time cancer survivor is nothing to sneeze at and I’m glad you got to spend the day together.

    But I am sorry there were also the sad moments of remembering Quinn and likely Alexis and Zoe too. I’m so sorry that the course brought back bittersweet memories. Sending love today and hoping for the next cycle.

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  2. That sounds like a great way to spend the day -- we have a Breast Cancer Coalition that has a walk/run on Mother's Day, too. What a great way to honor your mom and have a focus on something else on that day. I'm sorry that there were bittersweet nostalgia moments, too, but glad you could honor them. I am wishing you all the luck in the world for this next cycle. Thinking of you, and hoping that the rest of the week is kind to you!

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  3. "Only in the land of loss and hormones does one get nostalgic about nausea!" I can totally relate to this.

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